This is going to be kind of a tl;dr deviantArt story, mainly because deviantArt has been one of the places that's had the biggest impact on my life, ever. I'm not sure where I'd be without it.
But... to begin, my deviantArt story starts off with me being 16. I was a Junior in High School and, was very interested in the furry fandom, and wanted to 'be a part of it'. So I looked up 'furry' and found WikiFur, and from there I found Fur Affinity. Unfortunately at the time, FA had closed it's ability to accept new users onto it's website, so I wasn't able to get on there. As a second choice, I found deviantArt and joined that. I made a lot of artwork during my first few months on dA, trying to 'get myself known'. They weren't the best, but I steadily improved, and found a lot of new ways to draw things, and new techniques, and new tools and media, and so much stuff. I just... dA gave me a place to feel like I had something to prove.
This was one of the first pieces of 'furry' artwork that I did, that I was able to re-upload to this account.
My first artworks for the first few years that I was here were placed under a different account called Haleseen, which is now deactivated, and I'll explain why later. But during this time I learned a lot about myself, and what I was capable of, and what I was as a human being. I think within the first few days that I arrived on dA, I entered a chatroom called 'IamAnthro'. I wasn't very talkative, but here, I met some of the most influential people in my life. People who I don't think can acknowledge the changes that they've allowed me to make to become a better person. The first person that I met was NalaFontaine, she was kind of like a mentor to me, someone who helped me and critiqued my artwork and allowed me to get better. She was also very nice and had a great personality. She was someone who I always looked up to because she was a very real person to me; someone who had great artwork, and someone who I could actually talk to (not like, a name, not a 'myth' in my eyes).
This was one of her works that I really liked at the time and thought was really cool.
The second person that I met on dAmn was a little dragryph named Kirona, someone who grew to become very special to me. At first I thought that it was just weird, you know? Wibbling and Wobbling people an' things. But that just ended up becoming so much more, and, still influences the chat here in IamAnthro today When I met Kirona it had a lot of interesting artworks (from what I understand, some of them came from a different account) that I thought was pretty cool. It was also the first artist who ever drew a rendition of my fursona as a gift/friend art (I'd show that, but it's not available at the moment. It's really neat though, and I liked it a lot). That... was kind of the first gift thing that I ever got from someone, IRL included (though excluding family, cus, it's different ).
This was one of the artworks that I liked a lot that, kind of snuck up me at the time.
I was part of the chat for about 6 months, but I still had this weird title about me called 'guest' that really should have disappeared a while before then. But after becoming a pretty decent member of the chat, I was 'caught' helping out another person to know what a furry was and what fursuits were and things and was promoted by KovoWolf. She's currently now the Anthro Community art volunteer for dA (I think that's the title), and represents us and tries her hardest to get us all together and stuff. But she was one of the first 'cool' people that I met, like someone who had really epic artwork and was like a real person that I could talk to. The second person would have been T0xicEye. Both of these people were Moderators, and eventually Senior Moderators (or, Senior Chat Staff, as it was called back then) of the IamAnthro chatroom. They were really cool people who despite sometimes having long absences, were really a big part of the team there. They always made the place feel like home.
This was one of the artworks that I really liked from KovoWolf
during this time.
This was a really awesome picture by T0xicEye
that really inspired me to try to draw cool things.
Then there was Gradendine, he is... someone who I can't define. Somewhere between a father figure and a friend. He was always there for me to talk to and I always tried to be there for him too. There was so much cool stuff that we talked about, like prototype design, and 3d modeling, and drawing, and personal life stuff. Just.. he was a really cool guy. I'm not really sure where he is now, but sometimes I can catch up with him on the chats if he shows up and stuff, which is always welcoming.
Dem inventions. So epic. :3
After a while I started making a lot of new friends, some of which I still have today (which have the privilege of being on my 'friends list' on my dA page). One of those friends who is really awesome, and someone who I eventually was able to talk about technology with was Wolvenmoon (I wanted to call you your skype name >.>", but then I remembered that that's not you here x3). He was one of the more lighthearted members and always like, was funny and stuff and kept the morale in IamAnthro up a lot. Also, he was one of the first people who made me question (and eventually would change) my stances and political ideology. He usually did this through neat journals (which he's probably the only one who used those the right way).
I still like this logo the best
There was a pivotal time in IamAnthro where I did something that I never thought I would do. That was, actually caring about someone. My life had been full of loss and I kind of forgot the meaning of how to... be a person and have feelings. But one day when I was out visiting a college in Orlando, Kirona kind of disappeared. It freaked out and made me really worried and care about its well-being. So I took it upon myself to do what I could, and I drew it a picture. That was the first time I'd done something like that without being 'requested' to do it.
This was that picture that I drew for it.
During that time period I also drew quite a few things which were monumental to myself.
I drew this, Which no-one really liked. But it was a culmination of pretty much everyone who was active in the IamAnthro Chatroom.
I also drew this, which was the first picture that I had ever drawn that made it into the clubanthro
gallery (personal achievement)
At some point during this time I was able to obtain a month premium membership (my first) from Pixel-Spotlight by winning in a contest (I'm not sure what the contest was though).
This was one of the pictures that I liked when I met her the first time.
During that Christmas, I... I started a trend that I continue to this day (not letting Kirona's membership to expire), but I gave Kirona a 3 month premium membership on Christmas day (that was my first real 'gift' to anyone).
This next year was just as eventful as the year before and gave me quite a lot of experiences, both good and bad. This year was the major onset of my bipolar-disorder. It affected a lot of what ended up happening this year, both good and bad, but ended it in such a poor way that I am still recovering from it too this day.
I believe the first major event that happened this year was when I freaked out on Kirona about something, and I don't really remember what it was. Then I took a visit to my dad in Mississippi and took a bunch of pictures and then freaked out on another friend. Then I pretended my parents disappeared (because in my life, they kind of did in a way, just, not the way I depicted it), and had a few mental breakdowns in the course of a week. Then I got stabbed. Then I just pushed myself way too far, and I also started really caring about people and my 'fake online identity' started breaking down because I really wanted to tell people like who I was on a personal level.
Towards the end of the school year (Graduation), I ended up becoming Kirona's boyfriend (my first 'real' relationship, even if it wasn't IRL). When that happened I was smiling for like a week straight lol and it was really nice to care about someone and actually have them care for you back. I never really experienced that in life until then, anyone who I cared about always left or forgot me. But, this was a really special time for me. Kirona continues to be a very special person in my life that I care about very very much. I then graduated and moved to Mississippi with my dad and got a job there. That started a series of a lot of different events.
This is probably the best picture that I have to represent our relationship.
Before I got a job in MS, there was a large gap in between when I moved to MS and then. During this time people started to migrate from IamAnthro to a different chat founded by Kirona, called 'OfficialAnthroRP' and 'IAMOOC'. Here is the point in time where I really got to know one of my friends named CodyTehFox, who was under a different account at the time, which changed at a later date. He was a really cool person and told me a lot of things that I had honestly never heard before and didn't know how to react at times. He was often a person who I could talk to, who was there to offer what guidance he could and listen to what you had to say. He was a really good friend to have during those times, even if there were rough times.
This was one of the first artworks that I really liked of his.
After 7 months of myself and Kirona being together, we ended up breaking up due to the increasing amount of stress that I was causing it and myself with my bipolar-disorder, which often times caused me to create a toxic environment for us. Unfortunately afterwards, everything kind of fell apart I fell into a very deep depression and became somewhat of a monster who ended up hurting anybody who he cared about. This kind of sucked because I lost a lot of good friends and hurt a lot of existing relationships which still have yet to recover from the fallout. I'm lucky that some of my friends today still are okay with talking to me and stuff. It means a lot to me that I still have you guys.
This entire year was pretty much spent recovering from fucking up. I ended up screwing up badly enough that Kirona actually Blocked me, and so did Cody. But I worked through those after I started seeing a counselor and taking medication to aid my depression and mania. I happened to meet some really neat people this year though, despite most of the year being pretty bad, one of which happens to be Stygma which, well, she's just a really cool person. I always like it when she features me somewhere, cus it's really nice of her x3. But anyways, she's one of the more awesome people who I met in IamAnthro during the 2013 year. Apparently I was friendly enough for her to remember me :3
I really liked this picture that she drew. It's really beautiful.
Pretty much, most of this year has been the same as last year, just trying to fix things that I broke. I was able to have Kirona and Cody unblock me, for instance and I've been steadily improving my relationship with them (or at least I hope so). Things have been looking up quite a bit lately too, even if I don't know exactly what's going on, things are going to be alright if I keep pushing forward and keeping to my goals. One thing that I learned is that you should never give up in what you believe in, no matter how bleak a situation looks. But anyways, so far, I've been able to make a few good friends here and there too One of which happens to be Romaji (who still owes me a plushie ) He's been a really neat friend and someone who I've been able to talk to and someone who I can be there for. He makes some awesome plushies and scarves and icons an' things x3, you should go get some from him . But he's a really cool person who's made a great environment for people to chat in that's (mostly) free from prejudices and stuff. I haven't been there much myself, but I've heard that it's a great place.
*teehee* I love this little emote that he made, it's so cute :3
But anyways, that's pretty much my story so far. I hope you enjoyed the tl;dr read Let me know if you need anything removed.